I first became sick while I was studying accounting at LaGuardia Community College. I was in my early 20s. I never thought it would happen to me. Both me and my family (I’m the oldest of three brothers.) had a difficult time accepting that something was wrong with me, that I had manic-depression.
I came to Fountain House when I was 33 in October 1994, after being referred by a day treatment program I was attending at Long Island Jewish Hospital.
I toured Fountain House and was impressed by its size and how nice the people were.
Fountain House has helped me know that I can go after something and be successful, whatever it may be and no matter how small.
I liked working with plants and in the outdoors, so I choose the Horticulture Unit right away. Pretty soon, I started going to High Point. I love working with the animals there, and I’ve become kind of an expert at raising and breeding our alpacas. We have a herd of 30 now. I’ve named a couple – our first newborn, April, and Little Ricky. Here is a picture of me with some of them in the snow.
I like the calm, the serenity of the farm. You can go up there and cook and eat meals with people. Watch a movie at night with everyone. You work together as a group. The Fall is very pretty because of the leaves.
I’ve become a core member. Core members know the ropes at the farm. We teach other people how to care for the animals, chores that need to be done, how things work. I’m very proud of the work we’ve done there.
I even got to be on TV. Channel 12 in New Jersey came to visit, and they filmed me feeding and petting the animals.
Some days I still have a difficult time accepting that I am ill. I don’t like taking my medication, but I know I have to to get better. I get frustrated because I’d like things to happen quicker.
Fountain House has helped me know that I can go after something and be successful, whatever it may be and no matter how small.
I had a bit of a set back recently, so I’m temporarily living in one of the Fountain House residences. They are helping me adjust to my new medication. But I’m looking forward to moving back to my own apartment in Queens.
I don’t let my illness make me feel bad. I go on with my life.
